“It is in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped.” Tony Robbins
Do you often find yourselves involved in activities you should never have committed to? Are you frustrated by your inability to anticipate what is now painfully obvious?
What was I thinking? If only I had thought more deeply before saying yes.
Our lives are full of activities we are supposed to engage in, pursuits deemed as beneficial, recommendations that are often defined as “perfect” and yet somehow, even with our best intentions, these disciplines are rarely completed and can depress our spirit.
This is particularly evident when choosing and planning a goal. Many actions require doing something we are not currently doing, and while each step is logical and often not particularly difficult, it rarely gets finished. This is frustrating when you were originally so committed.
I have, on the advice of the medical community, committed many times to swim for a lower back problem. Unfortunately, even though I can swim, I have never enjoyed it. I would agree and never actually swim!
I eventually realized that swimming did not source me but depleted me, and Tai Chi sourced me without depleting me. Before you agree to an activity you should ask and answer these questions.
• Do you look forward to the activity or do you avoid it?
• Does it light you up or diminish your enthusiasm?
• Does it integrate easily into your schedule or does it represent a major disruption?
If the activity depletes you, even thought it is the right thing to do, consider finding an alternative that accomplishes similar results, and is an activity that “sources” you. There are usually several alternatives and even though some are not as effective as others, it is better to choose an activity with the highest likelihood of completion.
To avoid stress, tension and misery it is essential to avoid negative situations, people and environments. Certainly by attacking a task with a positive attitude and determination you can minimize adversity, but with significant personal energy expenditure.
There will be occasions when you have to do a task no matter how you feel, as it may be the only viable option. When you can choose activities and actions that feed and sustain your energy and enthusiasm, and add value to your life rather than diminish your chance of success.
Before you agree to a yes or no reply you could say – let me look at my schedule and get back to you – or – can you give me some time to think about this?
Bothe replies are delay tactics but giving yourself time to fully consider the implications and options puts you in control of your decisions. It is better to take decisive action now that to suffer in silence later.
By asking… Does this source me or deplete me, you give yourself the opportunity to consider your options and look before you leap.
“Life is a matter of choices, and every choice you make makes you.” John C. Maxwell
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